unwanted or not?

Sometimes I feel like my dad don't really care for me. I can't feel that he loves me. I don't understand why he treats me like i'm a stranger to him. I always get jealous every time I see him playing with my cousins. Cause he never treated me that way. I always get hurt every time we fight. He keeps on telling me, "wala kang kwenta, kahit kelan problema ka. perwisyo ka lang. sna di nalang kita naging anak." It kills me every time he's telling me that. I got to the point that I almost killed my self. Crazy isn't it? But i've got no choice. My own father is not treating me the way I deserve.